Getting back to normal. What does that mean? Is it really even a thing? Maybe it isn’t.
Since the car wreck and subsequent complications, I’ve been hyper focused on getting back to normal. I’ve been in a state of denial when it comes to certain limitations that are currently presenting themselves and hard on myself because I can’t seem to get myself together and get back to normal life. But y’all… that kind of attitude has only served to breed self-loathing and depression, thereby stifling any hope of creativity and killing the passion I once had for what I do. So how do I stop holding myself back?
Well, the first step is to acknowledge the facts.
These are the facts:
There was a car wreck in which I sustained some serious injuries. One of those injuries has led to a neurological disease that can makes life hard. Things are not like they used to be and they won’t be that way again.
As unfortunate as those facts are, no amount of denial changes them. It’s okay to acknowledge that.
Step two is to accept and appreciate where I am right now.
I won’t be “getting back to normal.”
And you know what? That is perfectly okay.
I was discussing this topic with a new friend of mine several weeks ago. During our conversation, she asked me why I needed to go back so badly. She also asked me if there was harm in looking forward and reminded me that there some life events that change who we are forever. Then she followed up the first two questions with, “Is that such a bad thing, Amy?”
That is when I realized that “getting back to normal” is not an option.
Not only is not an option, it’s actually a very, very good thing. You see, I have been given the unique opportunity to reinvent myself. This new person has been through some tough stuff and has lived to tell about it. And while I have needed to grieve the loss of the life I thought I was going to live, I am beginning to see what this new realization means.
This is where step 3 comes in:
Get excited about the possibilities…
Getting excited about the possibilities means that I have the ability to create the life that I want. I can try new things as I get to know this new me. I don’t need to try to “find my way back”. I’m not searching for who I am or was. I am discovering the more authentic version of me. That is empowering.
I’ve spent the last few weeks reflecting on our conversation and I can honestly say that I am excited to explore this new life. I’m looking forward to discussing new topics with you and hearing about the things that you are passionate about. And if you are feeling lost after a major life event, come join me on this journey. Rides like this are always more fun with girlfriends!
P.S. As I’ve thought about what living this new life means, I’ve gained a greater appreciation of what having a new life in Christ means. I suppose much of it I knew in my brain, but it is hitting my heart afresh now. I’d like to share it with you in this post script.
When we are born again we die to life without Him. We become a new creature instantly. It is an event that has the power to alter the course of our lives permanently. We are instantly sealed in our existence with Him and He gives us everything we need for life and godliness.
Deep inside, we are the most authentic version of ourselves as the person God created us to be.
After turning our lives over to Christ, we get to renew our minds daily and in doing so, the layers of the old way of thinking begin to fall away and what remains is our truest self. Basically, as we cooperate with the Holy Spirit, we get to discover and recreate His original creation. That is profound, y’all!
Does it mean that we will never miss aspects of our old life before Him? Probably not. We have developed coping skills, comfort zones and bad habits that all need to be broken and we may spend the rest of our lives cooperating with Him, working to do just that.
It does mean that no matter what my parents were like or how many poor decisions I’ve made in the past, my future remains unblemished. It means I have the power to change. I have the power to know better and then do better; to grow in wisdom and understanding; to break generational issues and make a life for myself and my family that I would not have had without Him. In short, I have the power to be the very best, most authentic version of myself, and you do too!